Goodbye Tessa
by Indecisivly Undecided
Summary: A song fiction based on John Lennon. Tessa and Jem's relationship from Jem's point of view.


**I originally wrote this as a song fic for I saw goodbye in her eyes by the Zac brown band but have since realised lyrics aren't allowed unless they are public domain. I've rewritten it using the same basic plot using different John Lennon music and have deleted the other one. If anyone is interested in reading the other one PM me and I'll e-mail it to you.**

_Of all these friends and lovers_

_there is no one compares with you_

_And these memories lose their meaning_

_When I think of love as something new_

_Though I know I'll never lose affection_

_For people and things that went before_

_I know I'll often stop and think about them_

_In my life I love you more_

As Jem's lips left his fiancé's, he pressed his forehead against hers, muttering "I love you". It was a new and exciting experience for Jem, although somewhat alien, forbidden, if he said it out loud, loud enough for Tessa to hear, it might break. He loved people before but never anyone like Tessa, she made his past meaningless with the promise of their future. His mind inadvertently flashed to Will, she made his past bearable. He knew Will loved her too, and he loved Will, but as selfish as he felt Jem loved Tessa more than anything.

_All about the girl who came to stay_

_She's the kind of girl_

_You want so much it makes you sorry_

_Still you don't regret a single day_

Jem stood facing Tessa in her golden wedding dress, brown curls cascading down her back, a hesitant smile on her lips. He wanted her so much, and he knew he wouldn't regret but she would. His mind kept flashing back to the conversation he had overheard between Tessa and Sophie, earlier that day. "I love Jem" Tessa cried "but I can't bear not being with Will. If I were Catherine from Wuthering Heights, Jem would be my Edgar, the boy I'm supposed to marry, who treats me right and is well mannered. But Will, Will is Heathcliff, passion and love, the one I should really be with the one who will die missing me and I'd be willing to die just to spend a few minutes with. But what does it matter Sophie…please help me into my dress."

Jem could feel two pairs of blue eyes trained on him, waiting for his answer a simple I do. Instead he leaned into Tessa put his lips to her ear "You can't marry Edgar". He turned and walked out.

_I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink_

_I'm so tired, my mind is on the blink_

_I wonder should I get up and fix myself a drink_

_No no no_

_I'm so tired I don't know what to do_

_I'm so tired my mind is set on you_

Jem was sitting on the edge of his bed starring at the silver snuff box, he could feel his body withdrawing from the drug. His hands started to tremble, and his lungs began to collapse he was barely breathing. He opened the lid looking at what little he had left, in defeat he used it. In a few moments his breathing returned to normal and he regained control of his body. His box was now empty, Jem grabbed his coat and a dagger and left in search of an opium den.

_Picture yourself in a boat on a river_

_With tangerine trees and marmalade skies_

_Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly_

_A girl with kaleidoscope eyes_

Jem starred at the Yin Fen and then at the men lying on the beds at the back, he looked at the man who was handing out the little brown bags. He walked up to him asking for opium. After being sized up the man handed him a bag and directed him to a bed.

_Picture yourself on a train in a station_

_With plasticine porters with looking glass ties_

_Suddenly someone is there at the turnstile_

_The girl with kaleidoscope eyes_

Jem smiled at the girl the longer he looked at her the more he could see her eyes turn blue. A pricing blue the colour of ice, Jem was suddenly cold he sat up panicked she was freezing him, freezing him with her impossibly blue eyes and her ice chant "Cecily". "STOP IT!" Jem yelled "stop trying to freeze me, STOP IT!". She reached out to touch him, her hands brought warmth, she was giving it back giving him back his heat. He let her guide him.

_I was dreaming of the past_

_And my heart was beating fast_

_I didn't mean to hurt you_

_I'm sorry that I made you cry_

_Oh no, I didn't want to hurt you_

_I'm just a jealous guy_

Jem wasn't sure if he should go to the weeding or not, he'd been invited of course but he wasn't sure if he should go. Making up his mind he slipped in just in time to see Tessa drawing the runes on Will. Tears started to fill his eyes as he felt a warm body sit beside him and a pair of soft arms wrap around him. He turned his head to see pricing blue eyes and for a moment he thought he was looking at his parabatai, until his eyes focused on Cecily. He leaned into her arms and let her comfort him.

_Spending our lives together_

_Man and wife together_

_World without end_

_World without end_

Jem looked at Cecily, in her gold weeding dress as he said the following:

_Grow old along with me__  
__Two branches of one tree__  
__Face the setting sun__  
__When the day is done__  
__God bless our love__  
__God bless our love_

**Ok so I just want to let everyone know I used the following songs by John Lennon: In my life; Lucy in the sky with diamonds; Grow old with me; Girl; Women and I'm so tired.**


End file.
